My Story of Struggle Street

hspThis blog I decided to create as a way to share my personal experiences, opinions, and support in order to help who ever may come across and read it, as well as it being an amazing way for me to vent and express my feelings. So for those of you that may be interested i’ll fill you in a bit about me and my story.


Currently a 19 year old student nurse, in Dannevirke, New Zealand I was born and raised. I grew up in a religious family and now live with my boyfriend on a dairy farm, 15 minutes from majority of my loved ones. I have an older sister and brother, who both live with their amazing partners and my sister also has her 4 year old son. I have decided to take the remaining of 2017 off nursing school due to health conditions, but that will all be discussed soon.  Growing up I always had gastro troubles and my mum knew something was up from day dot because of me being a projectile vomiter as a baby (throwing up adult amounts each time). Throughout my childhood I always struggled to explain the pains and feelings I had in my abdomen, with constantly feeling sick and different bouts of pain it was always blamed on many things such as, diet and anxiety, along with lots of other diagnoses that we don’t need to get into. My current ongoing health conditions are Anxiety, depression, chronic migraines and asthma… these four are just the basics. From the age of 9 I had insane 10/10 pain bouts, that came on randomly and fortunately not very often. After many doctors’ appointments and hospital trips, I was diagnosed 8 years later with gallstones, an insanely young age I know but they do run in the females of my family.  That very year I was lucky enough to have my gallbladder removed surgically and we were hoping that it would be smooth sailing from there on. Being in my last year of high school when my gallbladder was removed I missed a lot of learning and many assignments, but I managed to scrape by and get accepted into UCOL for a bachelor of nursing.


My first year went by (I passed!!!)  and managed to cut it down to a few hospital trips and one hospital stay, due to abdomen pain…and of course leaving with no answers. My second year is completely different… I got through two papers in the first semester and was half way through my first, 2nd year placement in Palmy hospital when my abdomen pain flared up again, causing me to faint 2 or 3 times (no not because I saw blood of patients, that doesn’t bother me at all (I am a student nurse for goodness sakes)). This leaving me with 3 or 4 A&E trips just this year and again ended up going home once the pain settled, with no answers. After waking with intense pain one morning I decided to wait a few hours until the pain settled but this time it didn’t.. so I got Matt to drive me to the doctors in Dannevirke where my mum met me. After my GP saw me she rang an ambulance and sent me over to Palmy. Being in A&E for 5 hours it was decided I would get admitted. 4 days later I was discharged on pretty pathetic pain killers and no answers but I was desperate to get out of there. This was when I decided to take the rest of this year off to take time for myself for rest and focus on my health.

Two months later here we are! So after sitting in hospital, my pain cut down to a constant dull ache and since, it has not bloody stopped. Every single day I live with an ache that never leaves. I have been to the GP many times to see if they have magically come up with a diagnoses or treatment but still nothing. I am booked in to see the gastro team in Palmy in November but until then I struggle with this pain every second of every day. Seeing the gastro team, yes it is a step but the likely situation is for them to change my diet, which for 1. I have tried many different types and 2. I definitely cannot afford. Some days the pain is worse and an intense vice grows but I know going to the A&E only makes me tired and more weak. Bad attitude I know and I’m aware the more I go the more they realise how seriously I feel about living with this chronic pain, but meh who can really be bothered sitting in a hospital bed listening to 10 people all tell me different things. ESPECIALLY being half way to a registered nurse. So now I take each day as it comes and am about to have my first day as a preschool reliever tomorrow, fingers crossed the pain stays low. So from reading this post you see why I really am a Struggling Student Nurse.  I am just so grateful I have such supportive family and friends and a pretty alright boyfriend to get me through…. 🙂 xx